Nirvana

I once met a Rabbi. ‘There’s something magical about dragonflies’ he said. By Magic, he warned me not to take my mind to disappearing acts and vanishing card decks.  ‘They come from the depths of Nirvana hence their transparent wings which know no sin’. To reach Nirvana is magic. Do you comprehend?

Ostracized, the damsel fly would ordinarily share everything with the dragon fly (drags). They loved the same kind of insect for lunch just as they shared breakfast, they fly over the same kind of lake as a pleasurable group activity and they enjoyed basically the same leisure until the drags put pride in the relationship. The damsels were fond of holding their wing behind but drags didn’t like that and it would mean damsels were showing off or worse still covering up, and that simply makes you different and not one of us. How do we eat together and fly together and when its time to rest you put your wings behind your torso? It was a condescending act against the drags and so a council was set up. A council of 6 drags and 4 damsel. The verdict appeared one sided, but the council had the final say. ‘Ostracize the damsels’.

I’m scared, scared to share my fascination, scared of how you’ll see me, I’m ashamed and afraid of your presumed judgment, and that makes me judgmental too but I don’t know who you are and if you are any different from the others, but I once caught a fire fly. I thought she would glow for me all through the night and protect me with her luminescent green core, but I thought wrong. I woke up to her corpse lying at the base of the bottle I sealed her in. I tried not to cry. I really tried. The morning of that day, I let out her corpse right in front of the porch, It was hard to see how I killed a light, I walked away from the guilt, a few steps and I turned back to see the lifeless fly. But she wasn’t there anymore. A drag fluttered away from where I left her lifeless body, I could almost swear he had her entangled between his proboscises. But he flew away really fast and I hoped he took her to Nirvana. I hoped.

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